Creativity Blackout

Friday, February 24, 2006

I sit, I think, I think hard.
Thoughts escape my grasp.
Ideas play hide n seek.
Its all dark out there.
I know not where to go,
I know not where to seek help.
I think of only Thee.
Help me out, Oh Great Lord of Creativity!
I am wading alone through a creativity blackout.

It started innocuously sometime last december. I thought I would give my writing a break. Calling it a break was just failure on my part to recognize the symptoms. True, applications to MBA were taking enough of my time already. But I could still spare time here and there to accomodate writing. It just did not happen. I was done with the applications soon though and had enough time again in my hands. But I wasn't able to conjure up those random ideas which form the meat of my meaningless scribblings. It frustrated me. I took up reading "The Zahir" in the hope that travails of a man facing a similar issue would help me deal with it. But no, I did not have a "Zahir" to relate to what Mr. Coelho narrated. At my wits end, I did something that would inevitably bring out raw emotions in me, something that I knew would make me react at a deeper level. It was something that had made me tear my hair out in madness, cry in despondence, scream in anguish in the past. It had never before failed....

...I sat down to watch cricket. And it doesn't get any better than watching India playing Pakistan. Lo and behold, I have no luck even there. India keep winning one match after another and somehow wannabe literatis like me get no fun out of the happier moments of life. The output just doesn't flow and the blackout continues.

3 comments:

aarthy 6:45 AM, March 11, 2006  

I hate when that happens.

Sandip 12:34 AM, April 07, 2006  

Dude u ok? Seems down a bit. Take a break.. chill out with friends.
Why dont you plan a trip with our gang in Blore?
Whats up on MBA front? Winter finally giving way to spring here.
Things look better.

Shashank Jain 12:06 PM, April 07, 2006  

@aarthy, me too :(

@sandip, am very much ok. Thanks for the concern. Trip with boschlers....tat was a different era n this is a different one unfortunately. Maybe once u come back, the average enthu of the group will go up. No MBA this year for me. I have been a bad boy I suppose. Have fun in the spring!

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